


Little Mistake, Big Issue

by Doctor_Discord



Series: The Ego Manor [55]
Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Bim Fucks Up, Idiots in Love, King is Pissed, Magic, Magical Accidents, Panic, Shrinking, The Host is a Saint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-03
Updated: 2019-04-03
Packaged: 2019-12-30 17:44:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18320168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Doctor_Discord/pseuds/Doctor_Discord
Summary: Bim decides to fuck with magic again, and, as expected, it doesn't go well for him. At all.





	1. Chapter 1

King was in his treehouse when he got the call.

He jumped a mile when ‘Uptown Funk’ began blaring loudly in the otherwise quiet surroundings, scaring at least a dozen squirrels as he scrambled for his phone. “Jesus Christ – yes? Bim? What is it?”

_“Heyyy King! Uh, wh-where are you?”_

King’s eyes instantly narrowed at the tone of Bim’s voice, placing his fist on his hip. “I’m outside. Why?”

_“Could you uh…come to my room? Please? I…need your help.”_

King’s eyes narrowed further, suspicion coursing through him. Something was _off_ about Bim’s voice, he sounded… _strange_. Still, King complied, speaking slowly. “I’ll be right there. Don’t do anything stupid.”

All he got in response was a nervous chuckle before Bim hung up.

King practically threw himself out the window, scaling down the tree at lightning speed and completely disregarding the ladder. He bolted through the woods, making it back to the manor in record time and bursting through the back door. He wasn’t expecting anyone else to be in the kitchen, so when Google let out a startled shriek, he, too, jumped, nearly falling over before turning to face the android.

Google shot him a scathing glare, cheeks a dark blue with the animatronic Twitter bird Bing made him perched on his shoulder. “Tell anyone – _especially_ Bing – what you just heard and I will rip out your entrails and string them up in the backyard.”

King grinned, despite the involuntary shudder that ran through his body. “Sure Google. Your secret’s safe with me.” Google’s eyes flashed and King’s widened, and then he was scrambling out of the kitchen and deeper into the manor.

He slowed as he approached Bim’s room, apprehension suddenly rolling in his gut. He rapped his knuckled softly on the wood. “…Bim? What did you need?”

“Just…come in!”

King’s brow furrowed. Bim’s voice sound so…small, like he was shouting from the other side of a tunnel. And…was it higher pitched? Shaking his head, he just turned the knob, pushing open the door. “Bim, I swear, your stitches only dissolved like a week and a half ago, if you’re bleeding I swear –” He cut himself off, scanning the room. Bim wasn’t _here_. He couldn’t see him anywhere. But he had _definitely_ heard his voice. “…Bim?”

“Over here!”

The call came from by Bim’s desk. King walked over warily, stepping lightly. However, his caution went up in smoke when he saw what was _on_ his desk. His jaw dropped. Bim was sitting on one of his scattered notebooks and smiling sheepishly up at him, fiddling with the hem of his suit. He must’ve only been roughly three inches tall. King collapsed into Bim’s desk chair, folding his arms across the desk and resting his chin on them, staring at his tiny boyfriend with wide, disbelieving eyes. “You…shrunk yourself.”

Bim pouted, crossing his arms. “By accident! I was messing with one of the other spells Marvin gave me, passed out, and woke up like this! I called you as soon as I was able to get my phone to respond.”

King raised an eyebrow. “If you weren’t literally the size of my index finger right now I’d smack you.”

Bim just grinned cheekily.

King sighed, standing up. He scooped Bim up into his hand, giggling a little when Bim shrieked and fell back into his palm, flailing slightly. King grinned, cupping him in both hands as Bim struggled to right himself. “Aww, you’re so cute! With all that glitter you cover yourself in, all you need is wings and you could be a fairy!”

Bim flushed bright red, ducking his head as he crossed his arms and legs. “Shut up, King.”

King just laughed, beginning to head back to the kitchen. “Come on. I’ll call Marvin.”

Bim’s eyes shot wide. “No! No no no, don’t call Marvin! I’ll never hear the end of it! He _still_ has yet to stop teasing me about the _last_ time I messed with magic!” He rubbed the back of his head, refusing to meet King’s eyes. “I’m just kinda hoping it’ll wear off on its own.”

King gave him an odd look. “I’m at least taking you to Wilford and Dark then. They’re the ones who know the most about magic, at least in this house. They might be able to help.”

Bim pouted again. “Fine.”

King shifted course, instead moving up the stairs to Dark’s office. He shifted Bim into one hand – unable to muffle his snicker when he fell over again – in order to push open the door. Conveniently, both Dark and Wilford were in the office, huddled next to each other and bickering over what sounded like what flowers to have at the wedding. King closed the door quietly, stepping further into the room, and cleared his throat. Dark and Wilford glanced up, both looking mildly aggravated that they were interrupted. King smiled awkwardly. “We uh…have a situation.”

He held up his hand. Bim waved. “Hi.”

The two eldests’ jaws dropped. Wilford was the first to recover, a slow grin spreading across his face before he burst into laughter, tumbling out of his chair and landing on the floor with a dull thud. Dark’s expression quickly followed, amusement crossing over it as he grinned. “Well well well, this is new.”

Wilford suddenly appeared directly in front of King, peering down at Bim with a wide, shit-eating grin. “You’re so tiny! How did you _do_ this?!”

Bim just shrugged, refusing to say a word and refusing to meet his mentor’s eyes. King glared at him. “ _I_ wanted to call Marvin, see if he could fix this, but Bim was adamant about _not_ doing that. So I brought him to you guys instead. Figured you knew the most about magic out of all of us.”

Dark stood, walking over as well. He couldn’t help but laugh when he spotted the miniature, pouting Bim, completely red in the face from embarrassment. Wilford had yet to contain his own giggling, only increasing when he lifted a finger to poke at Bim’s head, completely knocking him over as Bim let out a noise of indignance and swatted at his hand. Wilford actually had to turn away at that, hunching over slightly with a hand slapped over his mouth as he tried his best to stifle his laughter. Dark rolled his eyes fondly. “Yes, you would be correct, King. Now Bim, hold still.”

Bim let out a small squeak, obediently going rigid when Dark’s aura began to wisp toward him. It wrapped around his body, completely hiding him from view for a brief moment as a look of concentration crossed Dark’s face. He sighed, withdrawing and revealing a pale, shaking Bim. “I have no idea _how_ you keep _fucking up_ this bad, but, long story short, you’re stuck like this for a while. I don’t know how long, but it’ll wear off eventually.”

Wilford finally managed to compose himself, spinning back around as he wiped tears from his eyes. “Magic _really_ isn’t your strong suit, Bim! Maybe you should just leave it alone.”

A glint appeared in Bim’s eyes. “I’ll get it right eventually! I just need more practice!”

King hummed, frowning. “It’s the ‘eventually’ I’m worried about.” He shook his head, smiling at Dark and Wilford. “Thanks guys. I’ll just…try to keep him from getting squished by someone.” Bim paled significantly, mouth falling open, as if he didn’t realize that was a possibility. King snorted. “Yeah, don’t worry Bim, I’ll protect your stupid ass. Come on.”

Bim shrunk in on himself. “…Thanks.”

King turned around, not quite out the door before Dark and Wilford picked up their argument right where they left off. He made his way to the kitchen, poking his head around the corner to make sure it was clear before stepping in. He placed Bim on the island counter, narrowing his eyes at him. “Stay. I have to head back to my tree house. I kind of left in a hurry, it’s a disaster, plus I need to grab my phone. Just…try not to die, alright?”

Bim gave him a thumbs up and a grin, and King vanished out the back door, sprinting towards the woods. Bim got to his feet, pacing around and marveling at his new perspective. Everything looked _huge_. The bowl of fruit on the counter alone looked like a Goddamn mountain. He was just beginning to debate whether or not he should try climbing it (for personal amusement) when he heard the sound of pistons and Google was rounding the corner.

The android looked _extremely_ annoyed, several glasses in hand and muttering under his breath about how Bing never cleaned up after himself. He was so busy talking to himself that he wasn’t entirely paying attention where he was setting the glasses down, nearly crushing Bim. The shrunken game show host dove out of the way, brushing himself off before placing his hands on his hips. “Hey! Google! Watch it!”

Google immediately snapped to attention, jerking his head in Bim’s direction. His eyes narrowed once he spotted him, eyes glowing slightly, before he smirked, tilting his head to the side. “Huh. A spell gone wrong again, I presume? At least this time you didn’t affect the whole house.” His eyes flashed, glowing brilliantly and not quite fading as he stalked closer, leaning down to study Bim further. His smirk was slowly becoming predatory.

Bim felt the icy rush of _fear_ wash over him as he backed up, hands raised placatingly. “Hold on, that was like two months ago, man! You can’t _still_ be mad about that!”

Google hummed. “Considering it took Bing two days to get my voice box operational again, I remain a little resentful, yes.” He lifted a hand, poking at Bim and knocking him flat on his ass. Before he could scramble to his feet, Google pressed his finger to Bim’s torso, pinning him to the counter and visibly delighting in watching him try to squirm away.

Bim swallowed, feeling far too much like a cornered mouse, and Google looked far too much like a cat toying with its prey with that feral little smile. He struggled, scrabbling at Google’s finger with both his hands and his feet, attempting to push him off. Google only pressed down further, and he winced, falling limp as he gasped for air. “Ow ow ow! Lighten up! I may not have stitches but I was still fucking impaled!”

Google only leaned over the counter, propping his elbow up and resting his cheek on his fist. “Then you best stop struggling.”

Bim just squirmed more, flipping him off. “Get off of me, you massive prick!”

“Do you really believe you are in the position to insult me?”

“Oh you’re fuckin’ kiddin’ me, now the robot’s talkin’ to himself! This house really _is_ full of psychos!”

Both Google and Bim turned their heads. Ed had appeared around the corner, staring at Google with a mug in one hand and a raised eyebrow. The android chuckled, straightening himself but by no means letting up on the pressure that kept Bim pinned. “On the contrary, I believe you would find what I’ve discovered _very_ interesting.”

Ed furrowed his brow, walking over with his curiosity obviously piqued. He snorted, nearly dropping his mug, when he spotted the still-squirming Bim trapped beneath Google’s finger. “Oh that’s fuckin’ _glorious!_ ” His eyes glinted. “Keep him right there, I have an idea!”

Google’s smile widened and Bim paled. “With pleasure.” He tilted his head toward Bim again, just in time to watch Bim push himself as upright as possible and bite Google’s finger. He yelped, but Bim didn’t even have _remotely_ enough time to get away before Google was snarling and knocking him flat once more, laying his finger across his chest horizontally and completely pinning his arms. He turned back to Ed. “Hurry up. He’s quite fidgety.”

“Hold on…one…second…ah ha!” Ed spun around with a wide grin, holding up a glass jar that someone must’ve forgotten to get rid of and looking much too pleased with himself.

Bim’s mouth fell open, going still briefly as panic rushed through him before increasing his struggles tenfold. “Oh no, _Hell_ no, you’re not putting me in that! Google, let go of me, please – _HEY!_ ” He let out a shriek that was a mix of terrified and indignant as Google picked him up by his wrist, pinching it between two fingers. His free hand scrambled for purchase on Google’s hand, legs kicking out wildly as Google lifted him so they were eye level. He swallowed. He was _really_ high up…

He let out another shriek when Google lowered him abruptly, his stomach crawling into his throat, and then he was being dropped, landing with a dull thud inside the jar. Ed immediately slammed the lid on, screwing it shut as Bim got to his feet, banging on the sides. “ _HEY!_ ” His voice echoed strangely, tears beginning to prick at the corners of his eyes. “ _HEY, LET ME OUT! THIS ISN’T FUNNY, GUYS!_ ”

His eyes widened when Ed flicked open a pocket knife, curling into a ball with his arms over his head as he stabbed through the lid, creating a few scattered holes. “Enjoy your stay, Bim!” Ed tucked the knife back away with a wide smile. “Consider it _revenge_.”

Bim lifted his head, once again pounding on the sides of the jar as Ed and Google walked away. He didn’t stop until his fists hurt and tears were pouring down his face. He slid down to the bottom, pulling his legs up to his chest and wrapping his arms around them, burying his face between his knees as he cried. _Where was King…_

His head shot back up, breath hitching, when he heard someone else walk in. He looked up just in time to see Eric rounding the corner. He pressed his hands to the glass, staring with wide, desperate eyes. “Eric! _Eric!_ ”

Eric tensed, glancing around. He did a double-take, opening and closing his mouth before rushing over. “B…Bim? What…what _happened?!_ ”

Bim gave a teary smile. “Tried my hand with magic again, didn’t quite work, and Google and Ed are dicks. Please let me out?”

Eric nodded wordless. “Yeah, of course just – _ah!_ ”

He was shoved out of the way, knocked out of Bim’s line of sight by the Jim twins barging into the scene, CJ pressing his camera almost flush to the jar. Bim backed up, pressing himself against the other side as they both stared at him in amazement. RJ nudged the other excitedly, bouncing on the balls of his feet. “Jim! Jim look, it’s amazing! This’ll make a _wonderful_ story!”

Bim shook his head. “No, I am _not_ being some fucking toy for you assholes to marvel at and film! _Just get me out of the fucking jar!_ ”

The Jims split in twin grins, and Bim swallowed nervously. “Au contraire,” they stated in unison, sending shivers down his spine. “We think we should _absolutely_ show this off!”

Eric suddenly reappeared off the floor, pushing the twins away from Bim. “ _No_ , that’s wrong! I’m gonna let him out, just, back off! Please?”

The Jims hissed in response, and RJ launched himself at Eric, igniting a slap fight between the two while CJ filmed them, cheering his brother on. Bim just sighed, sliding back to the bottom of the jar. “I am never getting out of here…”

He simply raised an eyebrow when Bing walked in, not bothering to ask for a rescue he probably wouldn’t get. Bing grinned once he saw the ‘fight’, racing over and placing his hands on both Eric and RJ’s faces, pushing them apart. “As entertaining as that looked, both Bim and Ed will _kill_ you, RJ, if Eric got hurt. So what’s up?”

The Jims exchanged looks as Bing spoke, snickering loudly. Bing frowned, staring at them with obvious confusion. “What? What’s so funny, what’d I say? Eric?” Eric shrunk as Bing turned to him, saying nothing but his eyes flicked to Bim. Bing followed his gaze. His jaw dropped.

Bim raised a hand. “‘Sup.”

Bing appeared frozen for a moment, before he hurriedly lifted his shades, as of to try and see him better. He grinned, bouncing slightly. “Oh ho ho _man!_ What did you _do?_ Has Google seen this yet?”

Bim scoffed, crossing his arms. “He’s the one who put me in the damn jar.” Suddenly his eyes shot wide, bracing himself against the side of the jar, when Bing picked it up, lifting him up to his face. “Whoa whoa whoa! Watch it, Bing, a little warning next time!”

Bing blatantly ignored him, shifting his gaze from the jar to somewhere behind him. “Silver!” Bim winced as he shouted, covering his ears, but the Bing was _sprinting_ , jostling Bim immensely and making his head spin. “Silver, you _gotta_ check this out, dude!”

“What is it, Bing, please don’t tell me you broke something again!” Bing skidded to a halt, nearly crashing into Silver at the base of the stairs, and Bim jolted forward, cracking his skull against the glass.

The breath was knocked from his body and suddenly he felt like he was underwater, his vision blurred and his ears ringing. He slid face-down to the bottom of the jar, Bing’s and Silver’s voices sounding fuzzy and distorted.

_“What’s wrong with him, what did you do?!”_

_“I dunno, man! He was fine a minute ago!”_

_“Come on, let’s get him to the living area!”_

Bim was only vaguely aware of being moved again, this time _much_ slower. He felt sick as he watched the ground move beneath him, feeling as if he were flying. And then he was being set down on the coffee table and Silver was tapping the glass. “…Bim? Can you hear me, are you alright?”

All he did was let out a soft groan, twitching slightly. His glasses bit painfully into his face, but he didn’t have the willpower to care. The noise of pistons sounded both too loud and too far away as Bing backed away from them. “I’ll go get Dr. Iplier!”

Bim wasn’t entirely sure how much time passed before Bing reappeared, Dr. Iplier, the Host, and Reynolds in tow. Bim managed to push himself up into a sitting position with shaking arms, staring with wide, unfocused eyes up at them, seeing double. He blinked, and suddenly he was surrounded on all sides by _giants_ , their faces inches from the glass, and they were all _talking_ , whether to him or not he couldn’t tell but it was _loud_ and he was beginning to hyperventilate he was so _overwhelmed_ – at some point he ended up curled in the fetal position at the bottom of the jar, hands covering his ears with tears streaming down his face as he screamed at the top of his lungs. “ _STOP, PLEASE, STOP, JUST LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT!_ ”

He curled tighter in on himself when he felt the jar being lifted once more. He flinched when he heard the lid being screwed off, but lifted his head in confusion when he began _sliding_. The Host gave him a comforting smile as he fell out into his palm, then spun on his heel and walked away, using his aura to ward off the others. Bim shifted into a more comfortable position, bowing his head as the Host held him close to his chest, cupped in his palm. He sighed, using his own arm as a pillow. The Host’s hand was warm and surprisingly soft, and covered in dozens of little scars he’d never noticed before. He closed his eyes, and was half-asleep when the Host spoke up, his voice much softer and quieter than usual. “Is Bim alright?”

Bim shifted upright, crossing his legs and folding his hands in his lap, leaning back against the Host’s chest. “I am now…thanks, by the way.”

The Host just smiled. They rounded a corner and Bim finally recognized where they were heading as they approached the Host’s room. “If Bim does not mind, the Host would like to keep him safe inside his own room. At least until King returns.”

Bim let out a breath he wasn’t aware he was holding, visibly relaxing. “Please.” He would forever deny that his voice cracked.

The Host chuckled, pushing open his door. He set Bim down gently on his bed before moving to his desk, picking up his quill and beginning to write, muttering under his breath. Bim shifted, feeling distinctly out of place as he scooted backwards and further away from the edge of the bed. He flopped onto his back with a sigh, completely spread eagle, and he suddenly found himself staring up into a pair of large, bright green eyes.

He let out a startled scream, scrambling to his feet and backing away as Peggy drew closer, sniffing curiously. The Host’s mutterings paused, and he turned his head towards the bed, one eyebrow raised. He split in a wide grin as Peggy batted at Bim, knocking him over and bracing her one front paw against his chest. “Peggy won’t hurt Bim. She’s just curious.”

Bim pushed gently against her leg, shying away as much as he could as Peggy sniffed at him, nose inches from his face. “Still, I’d rather not got smothered to death by a cat who can usually fit in my hand, thanks.” His protests were drowned out by Peggy’s loud purring as she flopped onto her side, draping her leg across his chest. She pulled him close to her, hugging him almost like a child would a teddy bear, and Bim squirmed, trying to break free. He was forced to still, however, by the threat of claws poking against his arm. He huffed. “Host, your cat is holding me hostage.”

The Host laughed, turning back to his work. “Technically, she is Bing’s, not the Host’s. And he advises Bim to just _relax_. He is safe.”

Bim grumbled to himself, but obediently closed his eyes, burrowing into Peggy’s fluff. The little kitten only purred louder, her chin resting atop his head, and Bim would _never_ admit it out loud but the rumbling noises and the way her body was vibrating slightly was… _immensely_ soothing. It was nice.

He was asleep in seconds.


	2. Chapter 2

King came running through the back door, slamming it behind him and breathing hard. He shook his head, spinning around. “Sorry it took so long, Bim, but one of my squirrels stole my phone, and none of them would _listen_ to me, and it took _ages_ to track it down and –” He cut himself off, blood going cold when he noticed a distinct lack of a salty, miniature Bim on the counter. “…Bim?” He darted toward the counter, circling it rapidly and searching for any trace of the other. “ _Bim?!_ ”

“He’s with the Host.” King spun around. Reynolds was leaning against the wall, staring at him with a raised eyebrow. Dr. Iplier – neither ego he had noticed when he walked in – was sitting at the kitchen table, his forehead pressed to the surface and his right arm dangling limply, the left pinned to his chest by a cast and a sling. Reynolds shrugged, smiling sheepishly. “We _may_ have gone a bit overboard when we discovered the state he was in. He was freaking the fuck out and the Host more or less saved him.”

“He locked me out!” Dr. Iplier raised his head sharply, bright purple stitches ordaining it plain as day and an expression of both distress and confusion plastered to his face. “He locked _me_ out of his room! I was just trying to help!”

King – normally – would’ve comforted him, but instead he just bolted, tearing toward the Host’s room. The second he raised a fist to bang on the door, it swung open on its own. He rushed inside, opening his mouth to speak with panic clear in every muscle of his body, but then the Host raised a finger to his lips, hushing him quietly. “Shhh…Bim is fine. He’s sleeping.”

King forced himself to relax, though he was still jittery. “Where is he, is he okay, what happened, _God_ I shouldn’t have him alone so long, I –”

Again the Host shushed him, smiling fondly. He gestured to the bed and King was quick to move over. All the tension finally left his body when he spotted Bim curled against Peggy’s belly, almost completely hidden from view by her fur, and both fast asleep, looking incredibly tiny on the bed. He smiled, gently scooping both the little kitten and his even littler boyfriend into his hands. Peggy immediately raised her head, blinking up at him with sleepy eyes but Bim remained undisturbed. He glanced back up at the Host. “I’m gonna take them back to my room. So I can keep an eye on him. I don’t know what happened in like the two hours I was gone but I have a feeling it was not good.” His smile softened. “And thanks. For looking after him for me.”

The Host simply smiled, tilting his head to the side. “It was no trouble. Now the Host insists that King make sure that Bim’s experience this small is not _entirely_ a nightmare.” His smile widened into a cheeky grin, and King flushed.

“Whatever. Shut up.” His blush darkened and the Host laughed. “Goddammit! I’m leaving, thank you, but fuck off!” He practically bolted out of the room, the Host’s laughter echoing behind him as he moved as fast as he could to his own room. He placed Bim and Peggy on one of his pillows, the kitten immediately settling back down, purring as she slept. King sighed, climbing on top of the bed and settling himself into a position so his chin rested on his folded arms and he could watch the sleeping pair.

He felt his heart do a little flip in his chest when Bim rolled over in Peggy’s grasp, revealing the soft, peaceful expression on his face. King had never felt more in love in his life. He reached forward, removing Bim’s tiny glasses as carefully as he could without disturbing him. “I love you,” he whispered, a lovestruck little smile on his face.

Bim just snored in response.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really do love Bim and his inability to do ANYTHING magic-related. Makes for wonderful possibilities. And yes, once again, there will be more of these magic stories! I have two already written, another planned, and hey, if you have ideas, let me know! Anyway, if you didn't get enough Dr. Iplier and the Host on Sunday, THIS Sunday will be even MORE stupid fluff between these two, involving an absurdly flustered Dr. Iplier and a very embarrassed, blushing Host. See ya then!


End file.
